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"I will never have ED." -Travis
(While playing catch phrase, Jared describes his word to Mike and Jason...)
"An actor from my same race and color." -Jared
"DENZEL WASHINGTON!" -Mike
"Exaclty!"
(Mike, Jason, and Kara are staring at a picture of Gordon B. Hinckley ...)
"We should probably take that down." -Mike
"Why would you take it down?" -Kara
"Because he's dead."
"Well, we put pictures of Je...""Nevermind." -Jason
"We need to move out guys and fast!"
"You planned your own birthday party?" "What a loser." -Christina
"I hate nice people!"
"Don't worry guys, maybe next time there will be prettier girls." -Travis
"Girls should have to declare when they're fifteen that they're going on a mission!" -Jason
"Then they have to wear a black arm band until they go." -Mike
"They should have to sign a waiver." -Travis
(After Mike wrestled Travis to the ground...)
"The side of my face is numb after you threw me to the ground Mike!""I feel like I went to the dentist." -Travis
"Yeah!" "You went to Dr. Murdock!" -Mike
"Yes, Colonel Alleger." -Dave
"I wonder what it would look like if you could shave in between your eyebrows and sideburns and then grow your facial hair out and it connected to your eyebrows?" -Jason
"Wow Travis, that book looks brand new." -Mike
"Yeah it is, I didn't even use it the whole semester." -Travis
"And so what grade did you get in that class?"
"Oh shut up Mike."
"This semester, I've been raped, flipped over, and man-handled!" -Travis
"Afghanistan, is that in Europe?"
"So what was the other girls name?" -Jason
"I don't know-I only remember pretty girls' names." -Mike
"Chimpanzee riding on a Segway!" -Dave
"Woop, woop!" "Party!"
